Mission: Space Station Spotting

So on September 7th when the Space Station was able to be seen we went over to my mom's (baseball field by my house is not conducive to night sky viewing) and went out back to see if we could spot the space station! We saw it and the boys thought it was sooo incredibly neat. Ryan kept pointing to every plane and star and saying "Ohhh I see it! I see it!" At which point we'd have to explain no, it was a star/plane. Zach got a huge kick out of it, and was the only one in his class the next day who got to stand up and talk about it because he was the only one (who admitted to) saw it. Yes, I annoyed everyone by taking pictures. lol. Here are some:

(Hannah (sister), my mom, Ryan, Zach)








John was annoyed with my picture taking (and the resulting flash) so he took my camera and proceeded to attempt to annoy me by taking my picture.

Have a lot of catching up to do.

Life has just gotten away with me the past week since I made my last post. And I'll try to catch up as quickly as I can but not all in one post. I'll be trying to do 1-2 posts a day to catch you up.
But everything's been going ok. Still haven't heard more on Bella, but we're choosing not to stress over it, we've increased the amount she eats a day and are having much greater success with a spoon. (Pictures to come soon) Zach was out of school almost all week with strep last week, and then when we take him for his follow up we find out Ryan had early stages of it so he got put on an antibiotic. Unfortunately... its giving him the 'rheas. Zach's soooo happy to be going back to school in the morning. I was non-computer for two days last week. Not due to sick kiddos (who actually slept most of the day), but because my computer woke up one morning and decided to hate me. Still have no idea what happened or how it got better.
So, even though all that's been going on, plus another glorious (pfft) period where I had cramps all 5 days plus for 2 days after, its been going well.

Update

So, we got her tummy x-rays in and all looks beautiful wonderful and fine there, no spot this time. Slowly, slowly, God's letting it all be fine. Now we're waiting for the Children's Hospital to call her doctor back to set up an appointment with the geneticist. Her doctor said he'd rather her go there next and then the endocrinologist only if needed.
As for me, I'm better. I'm trying very hard not to stress too much over any of it. John pointed out to me we've actually been through similar circumstances before (with Zach when he was two for something completely different...) and that it all turned out fine then, and that it'll all turn out fine again. So, I'm holding on to that thought. I think either this afternoon, tonight, or tomorrow this blog'll get back to its regularly scheduled programing.

Were you told to come here? (April 09 PR only)

then please go here: OPEN THIS LINK

How things are, and why I haven't posted.

I was doing really good at posting steadily last month, and then, if you noticed, if anyone anywhere is actually reading this, I stopped. Mind you I feel I had a good reason to. Something has come up in my life, and I haven't been able to post about anything else until I post about this development. I haven't posted about it because I'm not sure how I want to approach this. So, what I'll do is just quote what I posted about it somewhere else. Both the original and then update.

So, I took Bella in for her four month checkup. First her stats: 9 lbs 6 oz. and 23 3/4 in.
The doctor started asking me all these questions about her eating habits and sleeping and how she manages with her food. He asked the developmental questions as a sort of afterthought. She's on par everywhere developmentally, however, physically she's so small she's not even in the 1% for healthy babies her age. She's only gained 2 lbs (she lost 1/2 lb she used to be 10) since she was born.
He scheduled for Bella to go in for blood tests and an xray because he's worried about her weight since she eats so much (2 30 min nursings a day plus 3-4 5 oz bottles with either 1 tbsp cereal or 1/2 tbsp and one oz. baby food). He's getting her tested for diabetes, thyroid problems, stomach/intestine problems, and asthma. If those tests come back fine I have to take her to a geneticist to see if she has dwarfism. If that comes back fine I have to take her in to get some bone marrow removed for further testings.
In other words, there's something wrong with my baby but we don't know what.

My heart is breaking.

I took her to the hospital this afternoon for tests and they did the xray first, which was horrible to watch. She looked so uncomfortable laying on that table with the nurses having to hold her down. And then they took her back to the lab to take so many little vials of blood and she screamed and screamed the whole time.

I just don't know what I'm going to do. I won't find out the results until Friday or next Monday. We just need a whole lot of prayers right now. - Sept. 1, 2009

Bella's bloodwork came back fine, but there was a spot in her stomach that looks like a hard spot of calcium, but they aren't positive since the x-ray was focused on her lungs and the spot was on the very bottom of the x-ray. I have to take her in Tuesday for an x-ray of her stomach. Her doctor is also going to set up appointments with an endocrinologist and a geneticist. - Sept. 4, 2009

I haven't been sure how to post about this, because there are people out there who fake about having sick children to get sympathetic readers and tons of followers. And should (which I 'm praying for) the next x-rays and tests show nothing and Miss Bella's just really petite I'm afraid people will say I'm just blowing the whole scenario out of proportion for attention. See the dilemma?
So as I said, I decided to just re-post what I had posted elsewhere about it, and give you a brief inside look on some feelings I've shared with no one.

1. I know God does everything for a reason, but should my baby be sick, why? What possible freaking reason could he have for that?! I've never understood how God lets babies and children get sick and die. Its just not right. And if she isn't sick then why did I have to make her suffer through testing?
   
2. I feel hugely and horribly guilty. Its as big (or bigger) than the fear. Maybe if I had not taken her just to the Health Department doctor before this, maybe, somehow this could have been avoided or caught earlier. Somehow this has to be my fault. She's home all day with me, I care for her, I carried her in me for 9 months, so if something's wrong obviously I must have been the source.
3. Fear. Fear is a very very real thing to me right now. True, its wonderful her bloodwork was great, but the rest of the stuff we're testing for doesn't show up in the bloodwork testing, so we aren't fully out of the woods yet.

As of right now, I just want my baby healthy and prayers, not attention. Someone who would make up a story about a sick baby is beyond twisted, and they make people skeptical of people like me. So all I ask for, and nothing more, is for your prayers.

"I Sor-ry Momma!"

No he's not but we'll get to this in a second.
I am so so so sick of Ryan saying that. I want to know who taught Ryan that if he says he's sorry all will go back to being right in the world. Because honestly, with that boy, that's not true. Ryan thinks saying sorry is his get out of jail free card.
This is a list of everything Ryan thinks sorry makes all better:
- punching Zach in the eye
- throwing toys across the room when anrgy
- climbing on the back of the couch
- pushing everything off the coffee table so he can play on it
- taking things from others
and so on and so on. None of these things are truly bad (well except maybe the punching) but its the fact that he does them over and over, even after he says sorry. He looks at you with this face like "Oh please dont' hit me!" and waves his hand back and forth and goes "I sor-ry mommy! I won't do it again!" but then he does it again 5 minutes later!
So see he isn't really sorry.

So I'm Silly, I know

Okay, I know, I'm silly, slightly egotistical, generally obnoxious, occasionally rude, and almost always ridiculous. But... that doesn't mean John needs to point any of that out to me! Its one thing for me to call me rude, obnoxious, and immature; its a whole other ball game for him to.
John and I have gotten into several fights the past couple of days over everything and anything. I mean we'll both be happy and in a great mood, then all the sudden we're yelling at each other and calling each other names. (Mine I call him tend to deal with pieces of the human anatomy, his generally come from phrases listed above - maybe immature isn't too far off base...) My mom called my step-dad and told him about my status saying on Facebook that said "My children are so cool they make your children look like chopped liver" because she thought it was funny. My step-dad who also thought it was funny, and works with John, told him. John called me and said "Really? Trish, that's rather an obnoxious thing to put out there don't you think?" My response was no, it was a joke, and typical for my personality and usual statuses.
You would think after six years of us being together he would, oh I dunno, be used to the quirks in my personality by now.
It doesn't really matter, because honestly, its not like I'm angry or hurt, just baffled really.